To answer this, Worthy suggested that I articulate the conflicting feelings I was experiencing out loud. This is a form of Gestalt psychotherapy, an approach that emerged in Austria and Germany in the early 20th century that looks at the human mind and behavior as a whole.
Worthy suspected the main reason I was unable to move on was that I was held back by fear and hope. It was easier to latch on to the prospect of reconciliation rather than putting myself out there. In the back of my mind, I was still holding on to the hope that we would find our way back to each other once the pandemic was over.
But my healing process appeared to be a convoluted one. I spent months analyzing where I had gone wrong; I was obsessed with playing out different scenarios, wondering if that would have affected the outcome. At times when I allowed myself to be brutally honest, I would question whether we were even compatible. So why was I crying incessantly for so long?
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